Accepting Failure
The argument of accepting failure has drawn seemingly contradicting opinions from reputable media and successful figures. In a recent podcast with the owner of the Houston Rockets, Tilman J. Fertitta, he said “it’s time to quit accepting no”. In another podcast, Gary Vaynerchuk, a New York Times best selling author and speaker discussed a time when his guest was rejected for a position, reached out to ask how to improve for his next application to the company, and was offered the job.
The beckoning question now is, when do we push past “no” and when do we accept it?, using it to drive us towards getting better? Loving the process, as well as the content!
Embrace “Both”
Winning and losing
Yes and no
Slow and fast
Soft and stern
Conviction and listening
Accepting failure is like another how to handle success. Balance from pulling from opposite directions has brought me a lot of calm, happiness And success. You should always push past the first no. What’s the worst that can happen? You get another no. If you believe you have value to add which hasn’t been recognized, then you are obligated to try again. Accept a rejection if you strongly feel pushing will waste yours or another’s time. Generally, you can tell by the other’s tone when they have no intention of giving you a chance. At this point, you are much better off looking for another door to open.
Understanding the Idea of failure better
Failure, according to Wikipedia (I love Wikipedia), “is the state or condition of not meeting a desirable or intended objective”.
In many cases, people perceive failure as the opposite of what they see as success. So you hear someone being called a ‘Loser’ – a derogatory word for being generally unsuccessful or undesirable.
No one wants or likes to be described as a failure. The annoying part of it is that the term, failure, is not so much about the person’s own objective or desire that wasn’t achieved but another’s or society’s perception.
Calling a person a failure, in this respect, is therefore, cruel.
The other side of that coin is when we have set certain goals for ourselves but didn’t meet those targets at the end of the day. Sure, we will be hurt and disappointed but the steps we take thereafter will signify if we are on the path of failure or not.
There’s a lot we can (and should) learn from failure. A lot of the lessons we can learn are probably very familiar but for those who are new to something called ‘failure,’ the lessons will serve as a springboard
A better context of accepting failure
Jeremiah 8:4: “Jeremiah, say this to the people of Judah: This is what the Lord says: You know if a man falls down, he gets up again. And if a man goes the wrong way, he turns around and comes back”.
“If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;
can think—and not make thoughts your aim;
you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same; …
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!”
– From Rudyard Kipling’s poem, “If.”
No one goes out looking for NO. It’s not that you have to look for rejections. Understanding that rejections are inbuilt into any process saves you the heartache when you do get rejected. If you take your rejections to heart, it’ll slow you down and at worst will make you freeze. That’s why we say – Never take your successes to your head & failures to your heart, both are deadly!
Learning how to rebound from extreme situations is a skill that takes resilience and patience. It isn’t easy to back down off of the adrenaline of a win. Same way it isn’t a walk in the park getting up from a lose. No one goes from win to win to win, no matter what they say, it’s not true. The most effective ones just don’t suffer the huge mood swing when they mess up. They embrace it, learn and keep going! Embracing both, you will find the strong middle.
Embracing Failure – How to deal with failure and disappointment
The word “embrace” in this context (accepting failure) is not like a hug, a warm friendly and positive embrace. Embrace here means to acknowledge the negative, as well as positive outcomes, because there is a learning opportunity in either. If your business streak is like the Jets, “embracing your losses” could simply mean re-working your strategy. Embracing your losses can also humble you, and make you a better sport when you’re winning.
You aren’t going to win everything, that’s a solid fact. Your wins happen because sometimes you lose, that’s a fact too. Just because you lose doesn’t mean you fail. You have to embrace both, life is a balancing act. It comes back to the adage, the person at the top is there because they lost 100 times more, but kept going far more than the person who wins once and never knows anything but that feeling.
No one likes the feeling of losing but how you decide to experience it. Learn and grow or fail and die. There’s is no right and wrong. There was a time when people though people whom were gay were evil. This is clearly a Bad believe system today and the list goes on. What have you been taught today or in the past that you believe and will be bad tomorrow. Think about this for a second… ‘are your thoughts your own thoughts or is someone thinking for you’ Quite profound really isn’t..
Embracing your losses means you aren’t afraid to take risks, not that you get use to it and continually fail without care. Every loss is an opportunity to get better, which you have to embrace if you want to learn from them. Education is expensive; learning from your mistakes is relatively free and generally more effective.
What are you actually embracing in failure?
You are embracing the fact that you have lost so that you can learn from your mistakes, not embracing losing as a part of your daily routine. The point is, you are suppose to grow from these experiences. Understanding why you have lost is what separates winners from losers.
If you embrace failure and allow yourself to experience that loss, whether personally or professionally, you will absolutely rise from the ashes with an indelible and priceless level of clarity that only loss can bring. If there’s no room for loss, there’s very little room for true growth.
The Mindset of Balancing Success and Accepting Failure
Sometimes losing is just beyond what we did, if you have that mindset when the universe is dropping hard on you despite being sure you did everything at the best way you can, you gonna fall so hard and so low that you barely can breathe out even think about winning again because you continue to blame yourself for it even you know you sincerely did the best you could. If somebody winning, there’s high tendency someone else should thing of accepting failure. That’s just the way it is, not everybody could be on the winning side. If you embrace losing, you won’t give up trying again when you fall hard.
Both (success and failure) are important lessons for the journey ahead. Failure leads to experience. And with the right attitude and mindset, experience leads to expertise, which leads to success. As Michael Jordan has famously been quoted for saying, “I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”
Conclusion
The key to successfully approach failure is understand that failure is not only okay, it’s normal. When you realize that failure is part or the process, you expect and embrace it, knowing that there are important lessons to be learned and applied to future endeavors.
A mediocre mindset that refuses to endorse failure basically will end up being stuck and poor not just financially, mentally as well for the rest of his/her life. Cannot know what winning is if you haven’t experienced losing. We can learn from losing or we can get caught by it… it’s only a matter of choice!
How can you tell others about what to expect on the journey (the easy parts, the rough terrain, climbing that mountain top, and the incredible vistas you’ll enjoy when you finally reach the peak… and while you’re there – at what you thought was the highest point, you take note of the other places – that are higher still – where you can go from there) – if you haven’t experienced it yourself?
Finally, the journey is the destination and your happiness in that journey is amplified when you’re able to share your adventure with others!
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